I was married 6 years ago today. Unfortunately, it lasted only 16 months and took me five years to heal. I would be lying if I said it didn't hurt to think about what I was doing 6 years ago today and remember all the hopes and dreams that I held in my heart. If only it had turned out differently. I'd be married right now with a few kids of my own.
I have no doubt that God has someone for me. While I can't wait to meet this person and share my life with him, I'm scared about what the future holds. I'm scared to trust that completely and love that unconditionally again. I scared to put myself out there. I'm scared that I won't have enough to offer someone. I'm not 26 anymore. Will I find someone willing to look inside to my heart and all that I have to give? Will he see me the way Jesus does? Will he be patience when hurts or insecurities of my past relationship rear their ugly heads? These questions seem like mountains.
Thankfully, I serve a Mountain Mover! Jesus, you love more than I could ever imagine. Help me let go of all my fears and uncertainties and use this time alone to dwell in You.
3 comments:
Tammy you are such a special person - You are right - God does have a special plan for you and a special person for you to spend your life with. He will send that person into your life at the right time. I will pray that in the meantime you are able to draw near to God and believe what God says about you.
You are a remarkable person. I am so blessed to have you in my life. I am praying for the right man for you. Your honesty and commitment to wait expectantly for what God has planned for you is so inspiring!
Oh, I am in your boat and feel the same way. 37, left behind, no kids, God has my back, that's what I say, but sometimes its hard to remember!
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